Mom's Addiction

There is no smell in this world that is as soothing as the smell of a baby. Fresh baked butter rich chocolate chip cookie reassurance, with an eggy hint of vanilla rice pudding comfort, and the undertone of brown sugar oatmeal with cinnamon warmth invites you to press your nose to that little head and draw in the heady scent until stars dance before your eyes. The aroma makes you drunk with baby cuddle happiness. Often at night I lay with her long after she has nodded off in a Baby Magic induced trance, dazed with gratitude at how lucky I am to be her mother.

I have yet to find anything as soft as a baby's skin. The rich buttery suppleness of kid leather with muted whispers of satin silkiness and the warm invitation of crushed velvet beckons to the fingertips. When it has been a particularly tough day for us I nurse A skin to skin. Kangarooed together we let that snug peacefulness soothe us. My active little girl lays quietly after nursing, nuzzling close wanting to prolong that tranquility and enjoy the love that flows between us so easily. Burrowed there the outside world falls away from us, and we find true serenity.

It is said that a mother can recognize her child while blindfolded, by scent alone. I know this truth intimately, as I find myself addicted to the feel and smell of my child. Half-way through a trip to the store I ache for the sweet tang of her familiar aroma. My fingers twitch at the babies I see in the store, longing for the velvety feel of my own daughter's skin. Before I am finished with my shopping I am fixated on getting home, the addict franic for the next high. I race home to be with her and cannot find contentment until I have her in my arms.

From the second she was born A has given me more than I could ever hope or ask for. As I held her I discovered for the first time the true meaning of unconditional love. As I looked down at her I realized what gratitude truly feels like. Every day since her first she has taught me something new. Through her I have come to understand: wonder, awe, love, and gratitude. With her by my side I have experienced true graciousness, humility, generosity, and serenity. Most of all though she has taught me what it is to be truly and unquestionably happy.